Thursday, October 30, 2008

The Old Not Updated List That Used To Be On AOL Hometown

It is Baaaack !!!!!!


If your looking for a long lost laugh when you see a name like Epluribus Mays or April Furst get ready.
For all of you uninitiated comiconnomenclaturists (people who appreciate funny names) here is a little introduction.
This list consists of real names of real people. The names are funny to someone, usually me, or they would not be included. Some of the names are funny because of region, some are just weird spelling. Some were named by their parents, or themselves, on purpose, some are mistakes.
The list started when I noticed that computer entry people were keeping their own short lists of names. At the Chicago Police Department Area 4 Detective Division, the computer guy also had a list from the Cook County States Attorney's Office. I typed both up and passed them out. The response was tremendous. It seems that all kinds of people kept their own lists. I got some from the Chicago Board of Education. one lady from the Commerce Clearing House sent 250 names.
Once you are looking for names they pop up all over. For example my dentist, who I had gone to for years,was named Harry Shephard. This I think is funny but I never noticed until I started the list.
If you have name(s) that you think are funny please E-mail them to me. I will put you on a list to receive the updates, they are infrequent. The only thing I ask is that the names be legitimate. If possible include the whole name, even though only part of the name is funny. If there is something about the name that others would not understand please include an explanation. For example there is a street in Chicago named Irving Park. The fact that the Korean man and the Jewish women had a son and named him Irving Park would only be funny in Chicago.

Enjoy, Les, your name collector
E Mail:

And Now The List

.38spec,First name only,her father's first name is Pistol

Abel Sanchez,His brother is Cain Sanchez

Adorable Virgie Goody

Africa S. Bartlett

Aheavy Hampton

Aids Wyatt

Airastede Jones, Pronounced arrested

Al Rukn

Al Pacino Smith

Alabama Vest, Macon, Georgia slave who invented the Kazoo in 1840

Alan Fierce, Attorney

Alcodic Plaza

Alexander S. Flesh

Alias Comen

Allen R. Toothaker

Almighty Four Hundred, This was a legal name change that was used to honor his street gang. Originally named John Smith

Alphasigmaphi, First name only. The parents certainly take the fraternity thing far

Alvin Trivelpiece

Amber Corn

Amber Bottoms, 3 month old homicide victim

Amer & Ica, First names only of twins

America Tripplett

America Bysa

Amiable Lottmann

Annabel Elliot Outhouse, Author of the book Privies on Long Island

Annette Funicello Miller

Annoy Lee

Anthelen Unsel

Anu & Enu KMT, These two guys were fraternity brothers in KMT. They legally changed their names and opened a vegetarian restaurant Delights of the Garden in Atlanta. This restaurant does not cook any food but serves all of it raw. Another example of the Greek Societies members going nuts

Apostol Postol

April May Rains

April Chowers

April Showers

April Furst

April Love

April Cott, Sister is June Cott

April Monday Austin

Aquamarina Velvet

Aquarius Waters

Ar'son Jones

Areola Jones

Ari B. Good

Ariisted Johnson, Pronounced arrested

Arise Lewis

Aristotle Schwartz

Aristotle,Pronounced Arista Lee

Arizona Rickets

Arizona Collier

Arlo K. Funk

Armand Hammer, U.S. Industrialist, Occidental Oil, who dealt heavily with U.S.S.R.

Armin Hand

Armistice Day Richardson, Of course he was born on 11 November

Artherites Mann, Pronounced Arthritis

Artimis Bobo, Brother is Starsky Bobo, Sister is Sahara Bobo

Artist Easter

Assdrubal Rizzo

Atherdope Harris

Atlantis Harvey

Australia Dykes

Australia Johnson

Ava Maria Pasqinelli

Babbey Johnson

Baby D. Waits

Barefoot Sanders, U.S. Judge in Texas

Barry Metric, don't you wish he was a weatherman

Basher Naser

Basil Chessman

Battle Rankin

Battleship Gray

Bea Kuhl

Beauty L. Carter

Beauty Mark Lee

Beco Weedman

Bee Holy

Bee Ready, Perhaps a Boy Scout leader?

Beethoven Askew

Belch M. Daloon, Female

Bequethal Brown

Berestfull Jackson

Bernard Judge, Editor of the Chicago Daily Law Bulletin

Bespectacle Anderson

Bible Brandon

Big Hands Jackson

Billy Dilly, Oklahoma bomber Tim McVeigh's Army roommate

Birdie Korne

Blossem Isreal

Blossom White

Bluta Lumpkins

Bobcat Rucker

Boogaloo Payne

Boy Fredrick

Brain Cancer, His mother wanted to name him Brian, but spelled it wrong

Braniff Hover

Bright Sheng, Pronounced Shine, Composer in Residence, Lyric Opera

Brown Brothers Harriamn

Bryant Disco Boozer

Bugliss Collins Jr.

Bugliss Collins Sr.

Bunker Hill

Bunny Nightwalker Hatcher,Senior Staff Consultant, Human Relations Commission, L.A. County

Bunny Ann Grabonski

Burt G. Pohrman, In Oregon bankruptcy court

Bushair Zuby

Buster Vinegar

Buster Hyman

C. Sewell Weech Jr.

C.W. Crumpecker Jr.

Cain Sanchez, Brother of Abel Sanchez

Caldron Williams

Caleb Belove

Calvert Crudup

Canary Woodland

Candee Carton

Candy Clump

Candy Barr

Candy Kane

Capers C. Funnye, Afro-American Rabbi

Car Richardson

Carbon Petroleum Dubbs III

Caress Owens

Carmel Crisp

Cashondat Hubbard

Casino Westly

Cassius Clay, Not Ali but a child

Cater Evans

Cecyle Pickle

Cellars Jackson

Chacko, First name only

Chain Robbins

Chainti Seals

Charles Outlaw, He's a car thief

Charles Terrible, New Jersey Deputy Atty General

Charlie Clam, High School Counselor

Charlie Altoona, I wonder what Star Kist would say to him

Cheers Boozer, Convicted rapist

Cheri Dan Westmorland

Cherry Veronica Coke

Chester Fields

Chicago Politics all of these guys regularly use the first name of Dick.
Dick Phelan, Former Candidate for Governor in Illinois.
Dick Devine, Former Chicago Park District President, recent U.S. Senate Candidate. Used to work in Dick Phelan's law office. Currently Cook County State's Attorney
Dick Daley, Actually Mayor Daley uses the name Richie or Rich

Chinette Gilmore

Choice Eng

Choral Pepper

Chris Cross, Works at the U.S. Dept. of Education

Chris Craft, N.A.S.A. spokesman

Christian Prince, Yale student, Murder victim

Chrysanthamun Turnipseed, Brother of Hyacinth

Chubby Rover

Ciced Jones, say Secede

Cicero C. Sessions

Cicero Unique Gibson

Cipher "Anderson", He is a famous cryptologist and a professor of mathematics. I am not sure of his last name but his father, who was one of the men that broke the Enigma Code, gave him that first name

Claimate Franklin

Claribel Pantotas

Classic Ganit

Classy Baily

Clay Head, Brother of Dick Head

Clear Huddleston and his younger brother Clair Huddleston

Clement Harbour, Oak Park Detective

Clevester Reed, His twin is Levester

Clevland Brown

Cliff L. Drinkwine

Collie Rohme, Perhaps Lassie can find him

Commodore D. Roberts

Condor Soaring

Cornelius Tollfree

Corvette Burrell

Cosmic Wonder Crocket

Courvosier Martell

Crayon Coles

Crayonella Smith

Crazetta Davis, Mother wanted to name her after her dead father, Craig. Craigetta did not sound right to the mother. The father, Craig was killed while fighting with a DEA Agent

Crystal Clear

Crystal Seals

Crystal Bright
Diamond Bright
Sparkle Bright
Merry Joy Bright, all of the same family

Cuntrenna Wright

Curly Cration, brother is Timeless Cration

Curry Oates

D. Patrick Mullarkey, Dept. of Justice

Daiquiri Collins

Daisy Infante-Sampang

Daisy Field

Darko Pozar

Darling Lemon

Darreng Maiden

Dartanya Porche

Dartanyun Riggs

Dashaund Coleman

Daury Freese, It would be nice to order a Dip Top cone from him

Davey Crockett, Male black, rapist

David Wimp, This guy uses a adding machine to add the number 1 over and over until he gets to a million. This is his hobby

David Warmflash

David L. Yunich

Dean Dickie, An Attorney with the Dick Phelan law firm

Deathena Barr

Decal Dyke

Decatur Duplesses

Deflector Sears

Defray A. Calcote

Delaware Dawkins

Delerius Woods

Delight Cherry

Denman Moody

Denny Manymules

Dent Teen Murray

Deogracias Ruiz

Depravism Hozier

Derail Easter, Police Officer, I don't know if it's the same guy but Derail Easter was a motorman on the Loop elevated train in 1976 when his train jumped the tracks

Detroit Dunn

Devil A. Drink

Devon Showers, It seems that Devon killed Belmont while on Sheridan. At another time Devon killed Hubbard, all Chicago Street Names

Dewana Ball, Dewana is a 260 pound female

Dewey Drain

Dexter Duck

Diamond Bright

Diamond Robbins

Diamond Ringold

Diarria Knox

Dick Eater

Dick Head, Brother of Clay Head

Dill Pickle

Dimple Dang

Disire Vasquez

Dixie Kopp

Dizzy Bell

Dobbin Fox

Dog Doggy

Don Juan Evans, He is a rape offender

Doomsday Jones

Dorcus Withers, Homicide Offender

Dort Fauntleroy

Dovey Roundtree

Dr. Needle, Sorry not an anesthesiologist

Dr. Kneebone, Chiropractor

Dr. Waters, Urologist

Dr. Mangle, Chiropractor

Dr. Hyman, Gynecologist

Dr. Morbia, Cardiologist

Dr. Carver, Forensic Pathologist

Dr. Clay Hammer

Dr. Bonebreaker

Dr. Winke, Optometrist

Dr. Roger Slaughter, Trauma ward physician at Cook County Hospital

Dr. M. Cholera

Dr. Noble Emdee

Dr. Goldfinger, Gynecologist

Dr. Renee Hartz, Cardiac Surgeon

Dry Ice Washington, He says "peoples call me Dry Ice because even though I'm smoking I'm still cool". Dry Ice is his legal name

Duckey Bill

Duel Adams

Dumore Hardman, Most women would love this guy

Durwood S. Laughinghouse

Duwana Early

Dwight Christmas, Convicted rapist

E. Pluribus Mayes

Earl E. Bird, Head of an animal rights group

Early Wynn, Chicago White Sox pitcher

Earthaline Johnson, Daughters name is Mayola

Easter Hunt

Easter Sunday

Easterbasket Montgomery

Eater Bush

Ebony Black

Ebony Jeans

Eid Abu Hashish

Either Davis

Elevator Hudson

Eliz Endlicher

Elwood Cluck, Attorney

Emma Piggee

Enola Gay Bender

Epluribus Mays

Eric Gotobed, Lives in Little Snoring, England

Ernest Edsel

Ether Green

Ethereal Green III

Etoyal Farmer Ferguson, Brother of Hosia Farmer

Eulogi Rivera

Evangelist Jackson

Except for Deoder, who owns a beauty shop, and Stank, who I think should contract with Deoder, these names are not that strange but they all came up in the same murder investigation at a beauty shop
Roosevelt Gator
Deoder Brown
Encino Vargas
Capri Stank
Queen West

Excon Scruggs

F. Lies Camper

Factory Spears

Faith Dent

Famous Jefferson

Famous Ware

Famous Stubblefield

Fang Fang

Faye McCall Wham

Felin Quist Rushing

Fellonise Daniels

Felon Goodman

Felony Evans

Female Johnson, pronounced Fee Molly
The whole thing with the names Female and Male is interesting. When a child is born and the parents do not immediately give it a name the hospital refers to it as Female or Male with the mother's last name. Many people seem to leave the kid with that name. While working with newborns at Cook County Hospital my wife encountered many kids named Female. She once asked a mother where she found such a pretty name. The mother said that the doctors named the baby and she decided she liked it.

Fidel Cicero

Finuf Cacksakker, In Florida bankruptcy court

Flake Wells

Flatonia Joiner

Flavius Freeman

Flora Goo

Florida Luster
Former president, Luster Hair Products, her husband is Precious Luster

Fong Goo

Fook Quan Goon

Forest Nutter, Wisconsin teacher of the year, 1991

Forest Lovely

Forest Ranger

Forrest Hunter

Forrest Woods, Forrest live on Park Ave. in Forest Park

Forrest A. Plant

Forrest Flood

Forrest Aggie Sales

Forrget Nicole Leavy

Fred Fraction

Fuzzy Hooks

G. Severe Cole, Attorney

G.O. Rilla, Initials only

Gail April Showers

Galactica L. Pope, nickname Battlestar (sic)

Gary Cowman, spokesperson, National Cattleman’s Association

Sherry Marsala

Viperella Pinkstaff

Gazzola Vaccaro Jr.

Gene Poole

General McArthur Ware, He will not return, he was beaten to death after he climbed into the wrong person's car to sober up.

General Mack Varner

Genghis Kahn Harris

George E. George, George P. George, Brothers

Geronimo Pagen

Gimme Rush

Ginger Snap

Ginger Sugar

Glacoma Tamburello

Glade F. Flake

Gloria A. Sepsis, In hospital for a chronic infection

God Coleman

Godzilla Gorilla Pimp Hunter, 3 year old

Goldeen Bell

Golden Butts

Golden Brown

Gonorrhea Jones

Gordon Babyruth Fred

Grady Guilty

Green Flowers, Cop killer

Greene Black, D.D.S., Southern IL. dentist who is considered the Father of Modern Dentistry, perhaps the name refers to the color of teeth

Guilty Blake

Ha Ho, Arson Victim

Haawiaa Cherokee

Haley Rainey, His nickname is Lightning

Halitosis Harris

Hammer Budge, S.E.C. Chairman

Handel You

Handsome Johnson

Handy Cheeks Jr., Convicted rapist

Hans Christian Anderson, His nickname is "Executioner" he is a memeber of the El Rukn Street Gang

Happy Camp

Hardy Buzzard

Harmut Broghammer

Harron Honey, Tasty sounding isn't it?

Harry F. Twickler

Harry Port, He was convicted of killing his lesbian wife

Harry Seals

Harry Flower

Harry Shepard

Hehirtus Bryan

Heidi Doody

Hendon Chubb

Henry Chin Goo

Herrestine Burns

Hiawatha Cherry

Hiawatha Moss

Hightower Smith

Hillard Homes, The same name as a group of Housing Authority buildings in Chicago

Ho Ha

Ho-Wing Sit

Homer Goforth Homer, 1989 man with the worst driving record in Illinois

Homicide Byrons

Honey Combs

Hornsby Mims

Hu Suk, Female Korean

Huffing Williams

Hugh Munn, He is the South Carolina Law Enforcement spokesman

Hugh B. Sweet

Hum Lewis

Hung Wang

Hurrah Johnson

Hy Wind, Past president of a synagogue

Hyacinth Turnipseed

Hyacinths R. Turnips, This is an alias used by Hyacinth Turnipseed

I. Itchinose

I’m trying to work up a car thing, this is all I have so far.
Steven Buick, shot & killed his 7 year old son in Villa Park, Il.
Dean Olds, accused of arranging the murder of his wife in Wilmette, Il.

Illinois Turner

Ima Hogg, This one is the daughter of a former Governor of Texas. I don't know if she is also the pianist. I have an unconfirmed name of Ura Hogg who is supposed to be Ima’s sister

Ima Hogg, Famous Pianist

Ima Birdwhistle

Iona Ford

Irather Morse

Iris Flowers

Irish Greene

Irish Green

Iron Moon

Iron R. Tootle, Owner Tootle Oil Co.

Irony & Omen, Brothers, first names only, the parents planned on having a girl. The name they chose for her was Despairing Mist

Irwin Fuchsadoff

Itch Baines

Ivory Snow

Iwona Kus

J. Gaylord Cox, Former U. of I. professor, Gay Rights activist

J.B. Dataway

Jack Plum, his sister is Jill

Jack Ripper, Representative from Oregon

Jacqueline Around

Jagoff Jackson, Auto thief

Jail Soria

Jamshed Butt, N.Y. cab driver that got stiffed on a fare from JFK to Troy, Michigan. The fare was $2,000. plus $250. in traffic tickets

Jar Hompungphoo, Twin brother of Jas

Jaun L. Person

Jaundice Mahaffea

Jeffery Falick, rabbi

Jerre Birdsong

Jesse James, Three guys by that name currently live in Chicago

Jesse James, This Jesse is the Treasurer of the State of Texas

Jill Plum, brother is Jack Plum

Joe Friday , Head of the National Weather Service

Joel Dollarhide, accountant

John Yesno

John Outhouse

John Sukup Jr.

John E. Grayson, Sister is Johnny Grayson

John Hotwang

John Knowles Payne

John Outlaw, Cook County Sheriffs Deputy

Johnnie Walker Redd

Juana Lick

Judge Jolly, A judge in California

Judge Hardy, Police officer

June Cott, Sister is April Cott

Jungle L. Taylor

Justice Marshal Smith

Justin Case, Instructor at Brother Rice High

Jutwan Ray, say Jew Town

Juvenile Hall Lewis Jr.

Kalliopi Zafriratos

Kane Garreau, Is he from the land down under?

Kanshica and Kinshica, Twin sisters

Kelly Green

Kenneth Payment, Attorney

Kenya Cook

Kieth Penis, This was his name as listed on an arrest report for a Sex Crime. It turned out his real last name was Penex

King David Washington

King George Frisby

King David Nolen

Kingsley Fink

Kissa Bonner

Kitty Chow

Knowledge Clark Jr.

Korea Berry

Kris Kringle

Kumsuk Saringer, Her boyfriend broke her jaw

Lacy Clay

Lacy Hair

Lacy Armour

Lance Boyle

Lane Laneboys

Laone Willes

Lapunzel Wade

Largeaanpa Covington

Larry Derryberry, Oklahoma Attorney General

Larry Moe, I hope his brother is named Curly

Lasagna Blanks

Lastime Ratcliff

Latarshit Jackson

Latherio Meadows

Latraviata Woodhouse

Latreat Riddle

Latrine Gather

Latrine Philpott

Lavoris Dorsey, Mother of Abandit Dorsey

Lavoris Jones

Lawyer Sykes

Lawyer Helen

Learned Hand, Judge

Lee Lovelady

Legover Moses

LeGrande Poor

Lemon Works, Former high ranking Chicago Police official

Lemonia Works, Daughter of Lemon Works

Lepoleon Swopes

Lesbia Martinez

Lethal Hayes

Levester Reed, Brother of Clevester Reed

Libra Scales

Lichard Wilson

Light Keeper, Maintenance man for J.C. Penney's. One of his job was to change the bulbs

Lilly White

Lilly Easter, Killed her 2 year old foster son

Lionel Tiger, Naturalist

Litt Spears

Little Anthony Billups

Little Redhouse

Lolly Popp
Sody Popp. Sisters

Lorelei Paradise

Lothar Vashoz

Lotta Fish, The L. Fish chain of furniture stores in Chicago started by her husband in the 1870's. Guess what the L. stood for.

Love Lovelace

Love Everlasting Jones

Lovie Perkins

Lovlace G. Love

Lowe Myles, He’s a radio producer, not a used car salesman

Loyal Byrd

Luckie Clutse

Lucy Lacy

Lullaby Hill

Luncheon Sails

Luntine Bobo

Lyle Kyle

Magazine Christy

Mahesh Dikshit

Maim Sugermayer

Major Senior Sr.
Major Senior Jr.

Major Downer

Manuel Soberanus

Maple Knight

Marc Loveless, 1st openly gay appointee to Cook County Human Rights Commission

Marcella Fullilove

Marco Polo Cantu

Marijuana Pepsi Jones

Mariola Arriola

Marquess Queensbury

Marshall Gun

Martell Lee

Martini Meeks

Marvelous Suddeth, Murderer

Marvil S. Summer

Mary Christmas

Maryland Kitchen

Matthew Rambottom

Mavrick Thigpen

Maximillian Hell, Jesuit Priest, teacher of Machiavelli

Maya Kolpa, Politician

Mayola Reynolds, Mother is Earthaline

Meander Franklin

Melody Heard

Mentis Non Compis

Mercedes Bens

Mercedes Pink

Mercedes Byberg and her sister Lexis Byberg

Merry Christmas & Noel Christmas, Twins

Merry Joy Bright

Midnight Coleman

Mike Stonebreaker, Middle line backer, Chicago Bears football team

Million Aire

Milton Bradley, Witness to a homicide, probably learned that life is not a game

Ming T. Merciless, At least that is the name this person used when registering his car and getting license plates #CYS438

Minnie Pig

Minnie Storey

Minnie Kidds

Minor Wisdom, U.S. Circuit Court Judge in Tennessee

Mirrer Peek

Mona Lisa Bush

Monte Carlos, Radio Producer, KQED in S.F.

Montreal Blakeley

Mortisha Byrd

Motel Moorehead

Mousa Tineh

Muffy Lemieux

Mumtaz Japanwalla, She calls herself Jane

Muse O. Salami

Muthill Maddox

Mutt Standefer

Myrtly Quay Spain

Nacurvie Smith

Naket Reggs

Napoleon Washington

Narcissus Love

Narley Criss

Nature Lawrence
Casanova Johnson
Utopia Edwards
Sparkles Wages
All of these children attend the same school, same grade

Neamon Beamon, Burglar

Nefriteria Webb

Nevada Romance Harris

Nick Odeamas, "Litn'n" on the Amos and Andy television show

Noble Dick

Nosmo King, Not related to Nosmoking Jones

Nosmoking Jones

Notorious Ellis

Notrial S. Clark

Null & Boyd, Law firm in Boston, a partnership between Jessica Null and Maria Boyd

Nympha Maturi

Olympia Snow, Member House of Representatives from Maine

Omar Sharif Ford, 15 year old caught with a fully automatic 30 shot TEC 9 assault pistol

Ommen Brown

One Cancel Jr.

One Nite O. Love Washington

Ontario Wilkins

Opehelia Pullett

Ora L. Thomas

Oralique Solia

Orange Apple

Orange Washington

Orapin Duangplay

Oscar Omar Avila Wong

Outlay H. Meyer

Overby Williams

P. Yu

Page Belcher

Paige Turner

Palto Foufas

Paris Singer, not Piaf but of the Singer Sewing Machine Family

Paris Brewer, Murderer

Pashon Prude

Passion Fullilove

Passion Blue

Pat Mummey, Coroner, Spokane Washington

Patsy Dena Hill

Pearly White, Afro-American school principal

Pee Wee Ching

Peeper Leeper

Penney Candy Rivers

Penny Ury

Percival Pretti

Percy Pleasent Love

Perpetual Levy

Perry Dice

Pete & Repete, Identical twin brothers

Peter Wacker

Peter Sackrider

Pharmecca Posley

Phebruary, first name only

Philander Hopkins, Home invader of the elderly

Philander Rodman, Dennis Rodman's, of basketball fame, father. Philander has 27 children. He currently is living with 2 wives and 15 children in the Philippines

Philandred Spears

Philmore Iskowich

Phines Kennedy, Say finest

Phlimsey Head

Phylistine King

Picabo Street, pronounced Peek a Boo, U.S. Olympic Gold Medal Skier

Pink Oliphant

Pinkey Jones

Pither Webster

Placenta Harris

Placenta Jones

Plato Papps

Plato Foofas

Pleasant Weathers

Please Ransom Jr.

Pleasent Moon

Pleasure Heard

Polysteen Nettles

Ponder Riley

Poppin Cox

Possible Crawford

Precious Valentine

Precious Ivy

Pretti Patel

Preventive Johnson

Price Topping

Price Gaines Jr.

Primitave Mercado

Primrose Battle Jr.

Prince Moon, sister is Princess Moon

Prince Smooth

Princess Pimpinella Hohenholoe

Proffesor Resto

Progress Always Lloyd, North Carolina bank robber

Prosper Raymond

Purification Pastor, Rapist

Pussy Flowers

Pye R. Squire

Quarter Harris

Queen Ester Washington

Queen Ester Green

Queen Estelle Bishop

Queen Love

Queen Cuellar

Queen Green

Queenielove E. Minor

Quittin Watts

Quovadis Nabors

Quovadis Davis

Rabbi Brief, Rabbi is his tittle, I do not know his first name. We can only hope his sermons are such

Raisen Caine

Randy Radish

Rapfew Daniel

Raphead Lopez

Rattler Hatful

Reapunzel Wade

Regina Hoover

Reginald Absorbine Jr.

Regional Aldridge

Rev. Manger

Reverend, Elder E. Toaster, International Church of God. The side of his van reads, "Known Internationally as E.T."

Rich Mann

Rich Port

Richard Shiting

Richard Bodyfelt

Rick O'Shea

Ricky Raspberry

Rip Van Johnson

Risque Beavers

River, Leaf, Rain, Liberty, and Summer Phoenix
All of the same family, River is the actor, Leaf is the brother the rest are sisters

Roach Lee

Robert Krophol

Rocky Craft

Roderick Guilty

Roland Burglar

Rollin Hoard

Ronald McDonald

Ronald Bedgood

Ronald Dickover

Ronald Williams II, Brother of Ronald Williams III

Ronly Bonly Johnson, His real name is R.B. Johnson but some bureaucrat said initials have to be followed by the word “only”

Rope Jeffries

Rose Cohen

Rose Bowels

Rose Budd Redish

Rosie Redd

Rosie Cheeks, While she was locked up in Cook County Jail she still managed to get pregnant

Rotunda McClain

Rotunda Davidson

Ruby Sunshine

Ruby Duckins

Ruffles Brown

Rufus Raspberry

Rufus T. Firefly, This was a character name used by Groucho Marks but some poor person has this for their real name

Rupert Roach, Arrested with a small amount of cannabis

Rush Lyons, Nickname "Crazy Lips'

S.E. Senior Sr.

Safety Furst

Sahara Bobo, Sister of Starsky and Artimis

Saint Mary Harris

Salem S. Salem, Guess his middle name

Salmineo Jones

Sam Duckhoon

Samuel Camel, Armed Robber

Sandy Sea

Santa Claus, According to his State ID Card he lives in Winter Wonder Land, IL. and on the Pana Reindeer Farm in Pana, IL.

Sayonara Bey

Schmeara O'Donnell

Scone Blazer

Scoot Falkner

Scott Towle

Seaborn Buckalew

Semaj Reynolds, Mother's current boyfriend, but not the father of the child, wanted the baby named after himself, James. Mother thought under the circumstances the backwards James would be funny

Semetric B. Zims

Sendor Lumpkin

Sensious Brinson

September Melody Seals

Shanda Lear

Shandtanta Jackson, Twin sister is Shandtnana

Shed Willis

Shenoon Shy

Shep Heard, Police Sergeant

Sherman Tankskey

Sheryee Harddick, sister of Luevater Harddick

Shiney B. Brown

Shirley A. Bushyhead

Shirley I. Truly

Shitanya Robinson

Shonda Synthia Burgess, In Yiddish the word Shonda means an "embarrassment"

Shonda Leer, The parents pronounce it Chandelier

Shonice Johnson, She says Sure Nice

Shuggie Otis

Shunion Shine

Shyny, First name only

Signora Jona

Silester Gilty, Police Chief, Ford Heights Il.

Sinbad Abdula

Sing N. Nigger

Sir Lancelot Williams

Sirloin Satisfield

Skip Collector, Associate Director, The John Laroquette Show

Sleety Barnes

Smokey Forester, Sound mixer Universal Studios

Snow White Tamayo

Snow White, This young lady worked with my daughter at the Disney Store in a mall near Austin, Tx.

Somchit Inthisack

Soo N. Choo

Space George

Sparkle Bright

Sparkle Hayter, She is a reporter at CNN

Sparkle Champion

Spongetta Brown

Spotswood I. Qimby

Spotsworth Christmas III

Springfield Reifel

Starlette Jones, Assistant Attorney General, Baltimore County

Starr Saphire, Ornithologist

Starsky Bobo

Stereo Stewart

Sterling Gunn, Chicago Police Officer

Sterling Price

Steve Aquafresca, Apple grower and State Representative, Grand Junction, Colorado, Led a fight over water rights

Stillborn McGhee

Stone Lively

Sue U. Dinkelspiel

Sue Sun Shine, Sally Sun Shine, Sisters

Suing Davis

Sumner Slichter, Economist

Sun Cheary Griffin

Sun Tan, Burglary Offender

Sunday Folks

Sunny Cloud, Atlanta housewife who packages home drug test kits for parents to use on their kids

Sunny Diane Bluing

Sunsary Bryant

Superior McNair

Surbees Clark

Swing Dickey

Tad Manlove vs. Sterling Lemon, A court case

Taffie Kitchell

Takik D. Snipes

Tape Williams

Tatsuya & Atsuya, sisters, first names only

Taylor Wines, Federal Judge. I truly hope not in Northern New York District

Teeth Hunter

Tekila Robinson, Mothers name is Tijuana

Temperance Woods

Tera Sunder

Terrain Walker

Terrance Figures

Terry Cherry

Thakton Hemlock

The C. Sargent

Thee Weathers

Theopholis Baldman

Thomas Goldtooth Begay

Thumneater Davis

Thye Law

Tiarra Tops

Tiffany & Taffany, Twin sisters, first name only

Tijuana Robinson, Daughter of Tekila

Tillie Willie Zeiss

Timeless Cration, Brother of Curly

Tiyapholiniece Dingle

Tomaine R. Grissom

Tondria Green, Mother of Retondria Green

Topsey Jean Glantz

Toronto Brooks

Torreton Reap

Toyland Lewis

Toyota Crudup

Treemist Franklin

Triage Patterson

Trivia Hinton

Trygve Lie, U.N. Secretary General, 1946

Twin Baber

Tyzauntie Danials

Ubiquitous Perpetuity, A California nudist who says God gave him this new name

Udon Givafux, I have his mugshot and his expression matches his last name.

Uinckley Franklin

Ulfoncle Gilot

Umit Kapan

Under White

Undrains Hall

Unique Hills

Urban Queen

Urinal Martin

Urinalysis Scott

Valance Butcher

Valiant Brown

Vandel Victors

Varmit Nelson

Vathansombat Kanniga, Afro-American female

Vaya Condios Shuman, Law Review Editor

Vendetta Shavers

Venitian Samples

Vern Fern

Vestibule Hall

Vicki Fucks, Manager at Midwest Magazine Services for WorkBench Magazine

Victory Island

Victory Pearl Harbor Island Jr.

Vincent Money, Theft Victim

Virgin Marrero

Virgin Fullalove

Virginal Hollis

Vodka Johnson

Wadsworth Likely

Wae Phoe, Whenever police ask his name his answer causes upset

Wagdi Anis

Waggoner Carr, Texas Attorney General

Wakkevil Moore

Walasuckrylai Piscit

Walter Balls

Walter Restored Jones Jr.

Wammie Wilkins

Wanna Sugreekunt

Waving Ware

Wax & Artificial Flower, Twins

Wayland Dong

Weedo Dingledein Dasho

West Woon

Whatcha McCallum

Whit Cornman, spokesperson, United States Grains Council

White Folks Burns

Wigfall James

Will Lee Jones, Brother of Willie Jones

William Wayne Justice, U.S. District Court Judge for Northern Texas

William Crock

Willie B. Long

Willie D. Shine

Willie Warship, Dope Dealer

Willie Bandit

Willie Oneway

Willie Die

Willy Billy Guinea

Wilton Sogg

Wince Collins

Wix Unthank

Wonderful Terrific Monds, Plays Triple A baseball for the Macon Braves and was their top prospect for 1995

Woodser Ann Chocolate

World B. Free, NBA player nee Lloyd A. Free

Worthy Seaman

Wrencher Perez

Wyatt Earp, Currently lives in Monmouth, Il.

Yahynass Tubbs

Young Boozer Jr.

Youranice Campbell

Zhiavago Rambo

Zippidy Doda Day Jr.
Zippidy Doda Day Sr.
One of my co- workers received a crime report to follow up on. Zippidy Doda Day was named as a robbery victim. The detective thought someone was playing a practical joke on him. He called the phone number listed in the report and asked for Zippidy Doda Day. The lady that answered asked him if he wanted junior or senior.

Zowie Bijarro, I spoke with his father, who was a stabbing victim. He said that Zowie was named in honor of David Bowie's son

Zucchini McCoy